i didnt ask to be a bird, at its core, is an exploration of deep emotional vulnerability. The record visits themes of desperation, addiction, yearning, aimlessness – and whether through layers of metaphor or spoken plainly, it aims to make those experiences visceral. (LISTEN)
Where the first half features driving rock tracks that build to glorious explosions of synth tones and electric guitar, the second half is more delicate: it opens with an a cappella song, “take me”, followed by soft pop ballads centered on piano and voice. The listener is finally brought full circle by the end, completing a cathartic return to its earlier intensity.
Community is at the root of i didn’t ask to be a bird. j dylan paul is a member of Rotary, a queer collaborative art group, and a participant in the Discord server for the band Pacing. Members of these communities contributed artwork, writing, production, and performances, shaping the record at every stage. Many of these individuals belong to demographics the current U.S. administration seeks to marginalize or erase, and i didn’t ask to be a bird stands as a reminder that art will forever be more powerful than the forces that threaten to erase it.
Artist bio: j dylan paul wants their music to hurt a little. At its core is an honesty that asks for vulnerability in return. Sometimes the feeling is cathartic – like ice‑cold water after crying, or the shock of a deep breath of winter air. Other times it lingers, haunting and hard to name. It can be poignant, melancholy, or nostalgic without a clear origin. The goal is simple: that it aches, and that you feel seen.
Though some demos date back to 2017, the project in its current form truly began in 2022, when Paul was working as a mixing engineer on Pacing’s record Real Poetry. Amid a long writer’s block, they sent demos to Pacing’s lead singer and songwriter, Katie McTigue. Through Katie’s input and their collaboration on a few songs, Paul finally felt that completing a full LP was possible.
Before this project, Paul was part of a two-piece band with Tim Stefaniak, who also plays drums on the record. Together, they made synth-heavy, often mathy rock under the name Premises from 2019–2024. Paul continues to work as a mixing engineer, primarily in EDM, working on collaborations with artists such as SLANDER, Dylan Matthew, ARMNHMR, and more.
Unapologetically leftist, Paul is proud to have worked with several queer collaborators on this record and is a staunch advocate for trans rights, anti-capitalism, and ending imperialism and apartheid everywhere.
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